Staying in character (naked) for the entire party is beyond brave in my book.
But for some reason, your experience reminded me how nakedness in our typical Western world is such a challenge. I was 12 and home for the school year recovering from rheumatic fever. The school district tutor came by twice a week to keep me up with the rest of my grade. On one visit he switched things up and had me sit on the opposite side of the card table that had been set up in the living room as my "desk".
With this new perspective, my tutor suddenly had a full view of our bookshelf and the first book that caught his eye was one of my parents' books by David Weiss, entitled, "Naked Came I" (a book about the Paris art scene).
As if that wouldn't have been enough to flummox this rather proper gentleman in his bow tie and sport coat, he misread it . . . out loud . . . "Naked Game One?" he asked -- mistaking the sans serif "I" for a Roman numeral one. He looked at me as if somehow I might have been part of this naked game debauchery he was trying to and not to envision. I shrugged and simply replied, "My parents are artists."
That seemed to satisfy him at the moment. But upon leaving the house that day, I could tell it was still on his mind. "Naked Game One," he murmured to himself, shaking his head in dismay. I can only imagine where his mind took him as he tried to figure out how the game worked.
Later, when I shared this tale with my parents over dinner, laughter grew throughout the course of the meal as each of us kept imagining and then sharing different versions of what he might have been envisioning as he tried to make sense of the rules to a game that to him must have previously seemed incomprehensible.
I like to pretend that this moment was the inspiration for the game, "Twister" that came out a few years later.
Chris! Fantastic and hilarious story. Another great example of your family meal conversations and the kind of stories you all were in the habit of trading. The image of a tutor in a bow tie trying to wrestle his imagination away from fascination with a naked game is priceless.
Thanks Sarina. You had a similar idea you offered a while back that I feel is related, and similarly simple and powerful, which was "What if you did it like it was no big deal?" Gosh the mind is so good at imagining the worst, or even the absolute best to the point it becomes intimidating to act.
We really do build an imagined reality around the worst (sometimes the best too), bless our little selves wanting to make us safe!
Yes I see how it’s similar, and yet with this new question I feel like I’m granted a new vista of possibility. What’s the worst that could happen is definitely something I need to ask myself more often
What a great piece of writing! You really can bring the reader with you, what a gift. I often make some of my boldest choices by asking if I could live with the worst possible outcome. It's very rare that 'no' rules the day, so I love the framing. Understanding that the worst thing, frequently, is not that big of a deal is a great permission giver. Thank you for the delightful Saturday morning read.
This is so well said Ted. "Understanding that the worst thing, frequently, is not that big of a deal is a great permission giver." Thanks for your note, along with your good company in the risk taking department.
One element that I imagine you've had all your life is a keen sense of adventure, which lends itself toward risking far more often (and with far more at stake) than your average human being. Your "belt-only" fashion statement is yet another example. (Which begs the question: Did you ever ride your 12-foot-high unicycle in the buff? #KodakMoment) In any event, your ability to dive deep into what it means to be an authentic human, fully exposed to the world, is what makes all of your wise essays so enjoyable, engaging and informative.
By the way, given the amount of body hair I carry around with me, clothed or otherwise, if I were to write this essay, the subhead would be "Bear with me." I can't tell you how many total strangers have, through the years, approached me and checked me for opposable thumbs -- then offered me fruit... (Actually, that would be zero. But maybe I can expand on this "fur"-ther at some point.)
Not too many people can make me actually laugh out loud while reading Larry, but you're one of them. Re the unicycle question, phenomenal that you would intuit this might have happened, and in fact . . . you've sparked a memory for another story.
As for future stories, if you've ever played the game Twister while naked, please do NOT share this in a story. And for the love of God, nobody wants to see any pictures!! Or drawings! Thanks in advance.
YOU are fabulous. Your writing is extraordiary. Youre teaching is awesome. "Bare with me:" -- what a title! I am amazed by you.
I love the lines, "But we’re the ones who are responsible for the renewal of our own spirit from day to day. And such renewal requires the risk of becoming visible in our essence—both to ourselves and to others."
Ha ha, ok, but wait James. I feel compelled to explain to new readers that I've not been in the habit of exposing naked outsides to anyone, other than this one off early-life episode, for a very long time, lest we spark an unnecessary investigation. : )
Man, this is awesome. I am eminently grateful that you've elected to share your stories with the world, because they are, regardless of subject and without fail, delightful.
Thanks Rachel. For sure there is tie-in to the shadow theme. As I understand it, the shadow only gets longer the more we try to drive it into a corner.
…back here in the bay there was a butt towel controversy about a decade ago i can barely (pun intended) remember beyond learning that in the public nudist community it is polite to bring butt towels with you…wearing a costume to a party is an immediate vibe uplevel…good on you both to choose such a natural fit…
It's amazing how much anxiety abates when you're the one choosing the circumstance. But yes, I've had this as a bad dream too. We stayed for a good while but not the whole time.
Thanks Claire. Yes, I'm sure we must have been the cosmic origin and inspiration in the mid-80s for that whole glamour movement that followed eventually followed.
Classic Lewis... and a most potent message for everyone, me not the least of whom... the invitation to take a risk... that's kinda the theme of your life, isn't it Rick? Thanks for reminding me how potent it is.
In many ways the theme baffles me. I'd say yes, it certainly has been and them in retrospect, but there's so much fear in trying new things I wonder at how in the world all these adventures have transpired. I guess I keep trying to get past the anxiety, and in some ways have discovered how to use it as fuel, but that inner trepidation at approaching the new seems to always be there.
Tell you one thing, those party guests blew their chance to get in early as angel investors of “Just Belt!” Their loss was your gain.
ha ha, yes, when you start investing in intentional embarrassment early in life the dividends that are later paid out are beyond comprehension.
Staying in character (naked) for the entire party is beyond brave in my book.
But for some reason, your experience reminded me how nakedness in our typical Western world is such a challenge. I was 12 and home for the school year recovering from rheumatic fever. The school district tutor came by twice a week to keep me up with the rest of my grade. On one visit he switched things up and had me sit on the opposite side of the card table that had been set up in the living room as my "desk".
With this new perspective, my tutor suddenly had a full view of our bookshelf and the first book that caught his eye was one of my parents' books by David Weiss, entitled, "Naked Came I" (a book about the Paris art scene).
As if that wouldn't have been enough to flummox this rather proper gentleman in his bow tie and sport coat, he misread it . . . out loud . . . "Naked Game One?" he asked -- mistaking the sans serif "I" for a Roman numeral one. He looked at me as if somehow I might have been part of this naked game debauchery he was trying to and not to envision. I shrugged and simply replied, "My parents are artists."
That seemed to satisfy him at the moment. But upon leaving the house that day, I could tell it was still on his mind. "Naked Game One," he murmured to himself, shaking his head in dismay. I can only imagine where his mind took him as he tried to figure out how the game worked.
Later, when I shared this tale with my parents over dinner, laughter grew throughout the course of the meal as each of us kept imagining and then sharing different versions of what he might have been envisioning as he tried to make sense of the rules to a game that to him must have previously seemed incomprehensible.
I like to pretend that this moment was the inspiration for the game, "Twister" that came out a few years later.
Chris! Fantastic and hilarious story. Another great example of your family meal conversations and the kind of stories you all were in the habit of trading. The image of a tutor in a bow tie trying to wrestle his imagination away from fascination with a naked game is priceless.
Chris, you've had sooooo many interesting things happen in your life, this story could be a chapter in your next book.
‘What’s the worst that could happen?’ I really love the simplicity and power of this!
Thanks Sarina. You had a similar idea you offered a while back that I feel is related, and similarly simple and powerful, which was "What if you did it like it was no big deal?" Gosh the mind is so good at imagining the worst, or even the absolute best to the point it becomes intimidating to act.
We really do build an imagined reality around the worst (sometimes the best too), bless our little selves wanting to make us safe!
Yes I see how it’s similar, and yet with this new question I feel like I’m granted a new vista of possibility. What’s the worst that could happen is definitely something I need to ask myself more often
What a great piece of writing! You really can bring the reader with you, what a gift. I often make some of my boldest choices by asking if I could live with the worst possible outcome. It's very rare that 'no' rules the day, so I love the framing. Understanding that the worst thing, frequently, is not that big of a deal is a great permission giver. Thank you for the delightful Saturday morning read.
This is so well said Ted. "Understanding that the worst thing, frequently, is not that big of a deal is a great permission giver." Thanks for your note, along with your good company in the risk taking department.
One element that I imagine you've had all your life is a keen sense of adventure, which lends itself toward risking far more often (and with far more at stake) than your average human being. Your "belt-only" fashion statement is yet another example. (Which begs the question: Did you ever ride your 12-foot-high unicycle in the buff? #KodakMoment) In any event, your ability to dive deep into what it means to be an authentic human, fully exposed to the world, is what makes all of your wise essays so enjoyable, engaging and informative.
By the way, given the amount of body hair I carry around with me, clothed or otherwise, if I were to write this essay, the subhead would be "Bear with me." I can't tell you how many total strangers have, through the years, approached me and checked me for opposable thumbs -- then offered me fruit... (Actually, that would be zero. But maybe I can expand on this "fur"-ther at some point.)
Not too many people can make me actually laugh out loud while reading Larry, but you're one of them. Re the unicycle question, phenomenal that you would intuit this might have happened, and in fact . . . you've sparked a memory for another story.
Glad to provide the cheap giggle, my friend.
As for future stories, if you've ever played the game Twister while naked, please do NOT share this in a story. And for the love of God, nobody wants to see any pictures!! Or drawings! Thanks in advance.
Don't worry. Not tempted to share in any of the mentioned ways.
A beautiful rendering of a naked moment, Rick. Shows decently, indeed!
Thank you Mark. We're on that path of decent visibility together brother. Glad to be walking with you.
Fabulous!
YOU are fabulous. Your writing is extraordiary. Youre teaching is awesome. "Bare with me:" -- what a title! I am amazed by you.
I love the lines, "But we’re the ones who are responsible for the renewal of our own spirit from day to day. And such renewal requires the risk of becoming visible in our essence—both to ourselves and to others."
Thanks Amba! You make becoming visible safe and a total joy.
Thank you! That's part of my Holy Work, my raison d'être, my purpose in life.
I know that to be true and you walk your talk. What other work is there? To be an invitation to others to fully exist!
Thank you, thank you. And YES. I call that "being awake."
I am looking forward to meeting you, Rick, very much.
We need to set that up! I'll dm you!
Rick, I loved every naked word of this reflection. Thank you for showing us your naked outsides and insides, all the time. 🙏🙏
Ha ha, ok, but wait James. I feel compelled to explain to new readers that I've not been in the habit of exposing naked outsides to anyone, other than this one off early-life episode, for a very long time, lest we spark an unnecessary investigation. : )
Touché!
Man, this is awesome. I am eminently grateful that you've elected to share your stories with the world, because they are, regardless of subject and without fail, delightful.
Thank you Alex.
Rick!!!
This was wonderful.
How it made me think about how many times the belt-only Rick has graced the communities and conversations we share.
Sometimes we can’t unsee things. But sometimes we also need a reminder of what it is to be seen.
ha! great last line! thanks Eric
What a hilarious way to express something profound ◡̈ This is so simple but so true:
"The truth is, everything we think we need to hide everyone has already seen."
Reminds me a lot of Jung's shadow concept too. Thank you as always for your honest, vulnerable and relatable stories!
Thanks Rachel. For sure there is tie-in to the shadow theme. As I understand it, the shadow only gets longer the more we try to drive it into a corner.
…back here in the bay there was a butt towel controversy about a decade ago i can barely (pun intended) remember beyond learning that in the public nudist community it is polite to bring butt towels with you…wearing a costume to a party is an immediate vibe uplevel…good on you both to choose such a natural fit…
I just looked up "butt towel controversy" to better understand your reference. It would have been better if I didn't.
…apologies rick…can i interest you instead on a survey of all other available controversies and accesses for the derrière?…
I'll catch you on the backside
That’s a hell of a lesson embedded into a “I couldn’t bother to put on clothes” story 😆
Loved it Rick!
Thank you so much Camilo.
This sounds like one of those anxiety-filled dreams about exposure where I wake up in a cold sweat. Omg.
Lordy, you’ve lived a visible life! Amazing.
Did you 2 stay there the whole time naked? Your girlfriend must’ve been quite adventurous as well.
It's amazing how much anxiety abates when you're the one choosing the circumstance. But yes, I've had this as a bad dream too. We stayed for a good while but not the whole time.
What a brilliant story, Rick. Beautifully told, I was hooked until the end. Pretty sure ‘Just Belt’ became a glamour model trend in the early 00s.
Thanks Claire. Yes, I'm sure we must have been the cosmic origin and inspiration in the mid-80s for that whole glamour movement that followed eventually followed.
Classic Lewis... and a most potent message for everyone, me not the least of whom... the invitation to take a risk... that's kinda the theme of your life, isn't it Rick? Thanks for reminding me how potent it is.
In many ways the theme baffles me. I'd say yes, it certainly has been and them in retrospect, but there's so much fear in trying new things I wonder at how in the world all these adventures have transpired. I guess I keep trying to get past the anxiety, and in some ways have discovered how to use it as fuel, but that inner trepidation at approaching the new seems to always be there.
I know... but just think of the alternative ... of being invited to risk and saying NO. We know that's deadly.
Which is what would make that such a good story prompt. What opportunity do you most regret having passed up? I'll have to float that one to my group.